I'm sitting here in front of the computer, there are tears in my eyes. Why? I don't know. I'm so confused and I don't even know where to start my thoughts....
I don't have any great tragedy or sadness in my life. I have only small trials, though they may seem big to me at the time. Why do I have so much when some have so little? Why do I suffer with so little, when so many suffer so much? I guess it's just God's providence and plan. Lord, your will be done, even if I do not understand.
Sometimes life makes so much sense! As if all the pieces of the puzzle come together and I have but one fleeting glance... I feel as if I made sense of it all, then I don't. Or I just don't know. Is there "the deeper meaning in life"? Is that all just wishy washy? I don't know. It's all so complicated....
And those moments I have those great revelations, I am never right at the point to right it down, and I am unable to share it with you all.
I'll just keep trying...
....more:
How Can I Keep from Singing?
Robert Lowry
What though my joys and comforts die?
The Lord my Saviour liveth;
What though the darkness gather round?
Songs in the night He giveth;
No storm can shake my inmost calm,
While to that refuge clinging;
Since Christ is Lord of heaven and earth,
How can I keep from singing?
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21 comments:
I like your version better then Enya's.
confusion is difficult when you can't face it, because it's part of confusion to never be faced. if sin shattered the world into fragments, God is always there to put them back together again, even if they only stay for a little while because the cracks are still there. somtimes we can't see the cracks in the glass panel of our vision. are those the best times? or are the best times the times when we can still see the cracks and a hole here or there but it's still a complete glass panel?
love you Mj. I know it sounds trite and cliche, but everything's gonna be alright. you have an amazing, loving, family who will pick you up and turn you around, and there's all of us out here to give you hugs and poke you and poke you again when you don't poke back. that's what friends are for, eh?
yes, I agree with you. :-)
I do have an amazing family, and equally amazing friends. I'm not really too sad, though.
Please don't worry too much about me. You can think about me, everyone likes to be thought about, but don't worry about me. Save your worrying for someone else.
I love you. And I try to save my "I love you"'s for when I really mean them. <3
Wow Michaela, that was one of your best post ever. Keep right like that, 'kay?
:-)
Beth, you are annoying :-)
I love you, too.
Sadness is a funny thing, because it's all so relative. God gives exactly the amount of grace needed to handle any particular sadness and usually, in my experience, no more. So every sadness feels close to crushing but never quite all the way. There was a time when I would call the silliest little things trials, but they really did break me just as much as the more serious things I may have to deal with now sometimes do(Of course I'm still a far cry from a myrter, but you get the point). God just gives me more and more grace to deal with more and more difficult things... although I don't know that the trial/grace levels go steadily upward, either. They probably go up and down all the time, but always in proportion with one another. Am I making since?
My point is, don't discount what you're going through just because it seems like less of a burden than what people around you are going through. You are in different circumstances and a different life, God is going to be equipping you in the best possible way for you, which is most certainly going to be very different from the way he is equipping me or anyone else! A victory over what may seem to you a trivial trial is no less of a victory than Elisabeth Elliot's victory when she was able to go minister to the very indians who had murdered her young husband.
To be clique and corny, it's only in overcomming the little things that you learn to overcome the world.
And I'll pray for you and I love you! :-)
Yes! It does make sense!
I agree with you. The trial of what you bear is defined by what you have already gone through. And I'm not really, truly sad. There's too much to be happy for. Not just happy, though. Singing.
Oh, and Em martyr is not spelled myrter. : )
rotfl!!! "Beth you are annoying." AHAHAHAHA!!! I'm sorry, I don't know why I find that so impressively funny.
I love you Michaela. :-) Saving your "I love yous" for special times is a really neat thing. Me, I like to tell every one "I love you" all the time because I never want a day to go bye where I didn't make sure they know I love them.
But that's just my own little philosophy.... <3
Michaela, that was a really beautiful post. You always portray such strength and matter-of-fact that it was just so beautiful to see just, you. I'm sorry if that sounds harsh or rude, I just can't seem to find better words.
*hugs*
Wow, Lindy that was really encouraging.
I feel really lacking on blog recently. Ugg.
Thanks for the compliment.
Definitely time for a new post.
Nice to have you back, MJ. I definantly understand the frustration.
MJ, when I first started blogging I had two word posts, I swear. then I went really long and dramatic. then back to two word. I think it's like a cycle where you're always learning more and more things. just keep going at it!
does that even make sense?
yeah, you forgot five hundred word posts that were ONLY depressing song lyrics! man I was worried about you. why didn't I ever tell you that though?
: )
Oh MJ!! Write me a letter some day! Some day!!
*hugs*
I will! I'm so sorry I haven't yet! : (
Don't hold your breath, okay? I may write you tomorrow.
Sorry again!
Oh come come! All you've to do is sit for a minute or two, or 25 if you're like me, write out some thing simple like Katie describing the room and plop it in the mail box!
*headdesk* That was awful pushy. Sorry. :P
lol. I spent 25 min on my letter to you Lindy!!
Its actually two pages. But it isn't in the mail yet. I'm sending it today.
I love you MJ!
Yay yay yay! I've got three letters to respond to in the morning! *dances* it's so fun. ANNA I GOT YOUR LETTER! You asked me that on one of these blogs... just con't rememba which.
I got a letta from Katie aswell. And Sarah! Fancy that! I'm just goin ta have some tea da'ling, want to join?
So, who's handwriting is best?
*cough* I know who's is worst *cough*
AHAHAHAHAHHA!!!!!! Kacy that is such a mean thing to ask!! I of course will NOT divuldge that information. :P I'm not so great myself, so, um, there! hahaha
No I love having so many pen pals! You gals are so fun! Is there any one else who wants to be my pen pal? Would Bethany Watts write letters?
*coughs* Bethany Watts doesn't exist. Do you mean Anna's sister or Elaina, my cousin?
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